Salt

from we've been the garages by the garages

"look:
this is me
what i am
everything i’m allowed - or ever could attempt - to be
trembling hands
hard to breathe
nod my head and pretend it’s fine
i’m just a little tired
dream of a time when living will come lighter
tell myself i’ll change with time

but i haven’t changed at all
i still fill all my wounds with salt
still just as out of place wherever i go
stuck in a shape i loathe
confined to a form i’m not
and it’s growing old
it’s turning to stone

breathe
nothing’s wrong
close my eyes
do my best to contain my pounding heart inside my chest
it’s my fault
it’s just me
why can’t i just be normal
not be heard unless you feel i’ve earned it
maybe you could like me 
when i learn to stop my heartbeat
if i just learn to not be me

but i haven’t changed at all
i still fill all my wounds with salt
still just as out of place wherever i go
stuck in a shape i loathe
confined to a form i’m not
and it’s growing old
it’s turning to stone

don’t let it show
fake a smile
calm my breathing and 
hide my shaking hands behind my back
what’d i think
silly me
did i think i’d escape this broken cage
did i think time would fix me
maybe one day i’ll be
someone who could fly free
find a hope beyond the scars

but i haven’t changed at all
i still fill all my wounds with salt
still just as out of place wherever i go
stuck in a shape i loathe
confined to a form i’m not
and it’s growing old
it's turning to stone

but i haven’t changed at all
i still fill all my wounds with salt
still just as out of place wherever i go
stuck in a shape i loathe
confined to a form i’m not
and it’s growing old
it's turning to stone

but i haven’t changed at all
i still fill all my wounds with salt
still just as out of place wherever i go
stuck in a shape i loathe
confined to a form i’m not
and it’s growing old
it’s growing old
it’s growing old
it’s growing old
i’m growing old
i’m growing old
i’m growing old
i’m turning to stone
"